“Intentions are the soul’s desires coming into physical manifestation.”

–Wayne Dyer

Every January, I like to reflect on the past twelve months and set intentions for the coming brand new ones, focusing on the qualities I want to manifest more than the things I want to achieve.

Since 2020 was a year like no other, that’s proving to be an interesting exercise. I find I have to “clean the plate” before I can move on to creating a vision for 2021.

First of all, the losses – the deaths, the fear, the isolation from family and friends, the fires, the political upheaval, the ongoing spiraling out-of-control worldwide pandemic. The people close to us who got – and survived – Covid. The constant hyper vigilance and worry.

Then there were the personal upheavals – my cancer diagnosis (happily resolved by surgery), my husband’s job loss in a pandemic layoff, our new sense of precariousness. The dawning realization that we are going to have to lower our expenses radically now that Alex has been forced into retirement.

I say this not to evoke pity, or even empathy. You, dear reader, have suffered your own losses in 2020, perhaps more grievous.

Alex and I feel incredibly privileged to have sheltered in place in the Tice Valley. It’s been a joy to find sanctuary during this turbulent year with our neighbors at Rossmoor.

Here’s what else is on my gratitude list for 2020: Despite struggles, Alex and I grew closer. Zoom and FaceTime let us stay in touch with the grandkids, and with beloved friends and family. We did Zoom game nights with friends and walked for miles in Rossmoor where neighbors wore masks and waved while staying six feet apart.

I did some good writing and stayed in touch with my writing buddies remotely, even attending our annual “Sanctuary” retreat on Zoom. Normally held the first weekend in January at Santa Sabina Center, a former Dominican novitiate in San Rafael, California, this year we agreed to meet virtually and “retreat” in our own homes.

Twenty-five writers cozied up in our own bedrooms, studios, and home offices to set intentions for the New Year, learn how to draw Zen tangles, make miniature books and collages, and talk about our hopes for 2021 – all in addition to writing.

It was a wonderful end to a horrible year, a year that grew and stretched all of us beyond our wildest imaginings. So I challenge you to think about what you’ve gained, as well as what you’ve lost in 2020, to remember what went well, what you want to celebrate. Maybe it’s as simple as a tree outside your window, or the slow return of the light as we inch away from the Winter Solstice. Make a list of at least five things you learned about yourself. What can you appreciate about 2020?

Once you’ve done that, you’ll have a solid foundation for setting your intentions for 2021. Mine include small steps like refocusing on sleep hygiene and getting a solid eight hours, continuing my daily meditation and Qigong practice, and walks with my husband. And bigger dreams like discovering new opportunities to share my writing with others, or finding a new, more affordable place to live – possibly near the grandkids in Sacramento, or in the Pacific Northwest.

Changed circumstances mean we have to adapt, be flexible, and find the pony in the pile of manure. So I’m flexing heart and soul, and welcoming 2021 with clear-eyed realism, and a touch of wild optimism.